WHY IS IT SO HARD TO CHANGE DIRECTION?

Hi Michelle,

I’m feeling very stuck. I feel like I want to change directions and do work with a deeper purpose, but I’m worried about making the transition. Please can you help me figure out why this is so hard?

Love from,
Melissa

(Letter shared with permission and names are changed.)

Hi Melissa,

I think maybe you’re living a life that no longer feels in harmony with your soul? 

You’ve probably worked hard to create the life you have now, and you have people who rely on you – and also who have expectations of you.

I suspect you hate letting people down – do you take your responsibilities so seriously that it puts a lot of pressure on you?

Most of us hate to be criticised, does that apply to you?.

If over the last few years you’ve dealt with increasing attention, sometimes it can feel like you’re living under the microscope, with everyone around you knowing your business – and often they’re not afraid to make their feelings and opinions heard, or question your progress.

All this outside ‘noise’ can mean that it becomes harder to hear your inner voice. 

And this is a problem because if one of your biggest gifts is your ability to tune into your intuition, read a situation, anticipate how things will play out and make a great decision based on your insight. When the outside voices drown out this inner dialogue it really throws you off.

This can become a bit of a cycle: you can’t hear yourself so you cast around for others’ opinions, then you lose yourself so you start to feel emotionally rubbish.... this drowns out your intuition even more so again you turn to others for help – and so it continues.

I’d also like to ask: What’s the past experience (possibly from childhood) that makes you think you it’s wrong on some level to quickly change direction?

It could be something like your parents getting divorced (especially if it felt like a sudden change), or losing someone who you cared about, an abrupt end to a friendship, or a sudden change in circumstances.

In these situations, our subconscious mind tries to make sense of the experience and set up a safety manual to stop us experiencing the same pain again. It adds warnings and instructions to the manual such as ‘Sudden change is painful’ or ‘Don’t rely on anything’.

These are the patterns we might be consciously aware of. What’s often a surprise to my clients is that the subconscious mind will also build a pattern around things that aren’t logically linked to the painful experience. 

For example, if the news of a divorce comes after a really fun day out, or time away from home, or being recognised for an achievement at school, then the subconscious will flag these things as ‘warnings’.

The manual then includes things like ‘Having fun ends in trouble’ or ‘I must stay close to home’ or ‘Achievements are dangerous’ or ‘I can’t afford to let my guard down’.

This instructions can then affect all our behaviours, but they’re so unconscious we don’t realise. We just get used to having fear and worry running in the background. We don’t realise that we’re no longer able to fully relax without the fear of something going wrong kicking in, or that if we achieve something big then we’ll experience a sudden and painful change.

Beneath the surface, an internal battle rages between your soul (which wants to have fun, break free, speak its truth, achieve great things, and trust that everythign is working out perfectly) and your mind (which wants you to play safe, hold back, keep quiet, make everyone else feel better, apologise for your achievements, and micro-manage other people’s reactions).

You start to feel so rubbish that you seek some help. Maybe a counsellor, therapist, or energy healer. You start to recognise and break down these patterns. 

Things begin to shift. You sense that you’re ready for purposeful action, but you’re so used to being questioned and criticsed (by yourself and others) for every decision that you’re not sure who to trust or where to focus your energy.

This is where you’ve got to get really clear on your purpose.

What’s your current mission? What are you really here to do? What can you most help people with? 

When you break down and heal your old patterns, and clear up the subconscious instructions that limit your abilityl to think freely, it opens you up to a new level of clarity around your purpose, 

And then everything cracks open.

Light floods in. 

You have something bigger than yourself to wake up for. There’s a point to the actions you’re taking. 

And then it won’t feel so hard.

(It might not always feel easy, but you’ll no longer be stuck in this shrinking bubble of limitation and fear which is currently causing you so much stress.)

Listen for your soul’s calling.

Heal your old stuff so you can hear your soul’s voice clearly.

Use your intuition to move forward. 

And the transition will come – everything you want is waiting for you.

Much love,

Michelle xxx

Have a question for me?  Send me a message here.